Meat and egg companies often try to sell their wares to unsuspecting SWPLs (“socially conscious” educated bourgeoisie Americans) by using the “free range” label. Unsurprisingly, this label is a lie. To quote the Wikipedia page on “free range”:

The U.S. Department of Agriculture Food Safety and Inspection Service (FSIS) requires that chickens raised for their meat have access to the outside in order to receive the free-range certification. There is no requirement for access to pasture, and there may be access to only dirt or gravel. Free-range chicken eggs, however, have no legal definition in the United States. Likewise, free-range egg producers have no common standard on what the term means. Many egg farmers sell their eggs as free range merely because their cages are two or three inches above average size, or because there is a window in the shed.

The USDA has no specific definition for “free-range” beef, pork, and other non-poultry products. All USDA definitions of “free-range” refer specifically to poultry. No other criteria-such as the size of the range or the amount of space given to each animal-are required before beef, lamb, and pork can be called “free-range”. Claims and labeling using “free range” are therefore unregulated. The USDA relies “upon producer testimonials to support the accuracy of these claims.”

Basically, the label is a farce. It conjures up images of old time family farms, when the reality is the exact opposite. Factory farmed chickens are routinely debeaked, and starved to cause forced molting, which shocks them into entering another egg-laying cycle. They live in filthy, shit-strewn cages and suffer from respiratory diseases due to inhaling large quantities of nitrogen released by their feces. “Free range” chickens spend most of their time in cages.

Specifically regarding eggs, here’s another source, the Humane Society:

The vast number of consumer labels affixed to egg cartons can leave a shopper feeling dazed and confused. One carton may label its eggs “Natural.” Another carton may call them “Free Range,” while yet another may claim its eggs are “Certified Organic.” How are thoughtful consumers supposed to know what these labels and claims really mean?

The truth is that the majority of egg labels have little relevance to animal welfare or, if they do, they have no official standards or any mechanism to enforce them.

Here’s another, more detailed pro-animal rights source on the Free-Range Myth. This organization, the Peaceful Prarie Sanctuary, provides a safe haven for animals rescued from factory farming. After their miserable lives, “spent hens” are terminated immediately by the egg-laying operations themselves, as their meat has no market value. Easy methods of termination include gas chambers, woodchippers, or simply throwing them into a dumpster to die. In one case, an egg-laying operation was caught red-handed burying thousands of hens in large trenches because it was apparently too inconvenient to send them to the rendering plant. Anything to get the job done and home in time for dinner, you know?

Whether or not you care about the welfare of chickens, the misleading presentation that factory farmers use to sell their goods is designed to instill false beliefs in consumers, and it is a good case study in deception. People want to believe that cage-free actually means cage-free, so they can feel good, but the whole idea is merely a falsity perpetuated by gullible consumers and cynical ranch owners. Essentially, humans are completely comfortable inflicting the worst imaginable suffering on any number of pigs, cows, and chickens to satisfy our taste buds, yet we expect transhumans and posthumans to treat us with respect. Why? The tyrant that carelessly inflicts brutality on his subjects is liable to get his just desserts sooner or later.

Do understand that kindness to animals is not necessarily all-or-nothing. One person can have a tremendous impact simply by making an effort to lower the number of animal products they consume per week.

While I’m addressing the topic, I might as well point out that “what about the suffering of broccoli and other plants?” is one of the most intellectually pathetic comeback arguments I have ever heard to justify factory farming. Everyone knows that plants lack nerve cells, never mind brains. Only someone completely ignorant of the most basic biology could plausibly make sure an argument. The truth is that that argument is merely a pithy joke designed to mock pro-animal rights arguments through misdirection. Its common use only illustrates that a substantial number of people who consume animal products see no need to justify their actions, and make no pretense at devoting any thought to the issue.

My apologies, but I will leave comments off for this post, because 1) the most plausible comments are likely to be from people who regard animals as dirt and are just trying to eliminate guilt by providing a pithy comeback, and 2) I don’t want to start too much of a precedent for animal rights debates on this blog, because there are many other places around the Internet to have them, and as far as I am concerned, the “debate” is mostly a non-issue. Yes, perhaps I could “win some people over” by being polite and engaging them in the comments, but it doesn’t really matter, because I am extremely doubtful that anything less than in vitro meat will bring down factory farming. Factory farming operations are expanding at a massive rate as the world’s standard of living increases but its empathy for animals remains where it has been throughout most of history — in the toilet.